11.26.2008
11.23.2008
sometimes i wonder why am i making myself so busy...sometimes i wonder why am i lonely...sometimes i wonder why am i changing myself...sometimes i winder why i can't be myself...sometimes i wonder what was my initial purpose of these stuff...
sometimes.i feel out of place.i wish for an eternal night where the city is quiet.i wish to drop everything i have now and stroll till the end of time.i wish i can choose not to have a purpose of my life.
11.15.2008
http://sammyboy.com/showthread.php?t=9470
haha. this thread is damn funny to read. but i personally agree that having lesser seats in MRT carriages is damn bad...the people who said we will have an aging population soon...also said we should increase our birth rate...also said that we should get more priority seats for senior citizens or pregnant women...so now they are taking off the seats to squeeze more people in per trip? LOL sia. it's rare to find our dear government contradicting themselves...no ill comments but i hope the organisations/personnel involved should re-consider about this decision thoroughly.
but on the other hand...i don't really like it when senior citizens or pregnant women are not getting seats from the other commuters. i stand for at least 90% of my MRT trips nowadays. so to all Singaporeans: please give up seats to those who really need it...before all these seats are taken off and everyone's standing! XD
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JBN7rEjjGrg
this is supposedly a footage from Japan...even though it's way much worse than ours but it's not really as if our population is as big as Japan's...but i wonder whether they do the same squeezing on elderly people and pregnant women too...? XD
haha. this thread is damn funny to read. but i personally agree that having lesser seats in MRT carriages is damn bad...the people who said we will have an aging population soon...also said we should increase our birth rate...also said that we should get more priority seats for senior citizens or pregnant women...so now they are taking off the seats to squeeze more people in per trip? LOL sia. it's rare to find our dear government contradicting themselves...no ill comments but i hope the organisations/personnel involved should re-consider about this decision thoroughly.
but on the other hand...i don't really like it when senior citizens or pregnant women are not getting seats from the other commuters. i stand for at least 90% of my MRT trips nowadays. so to all Singaporeans: please give up seats to those who really need it...before all these seats are taken off and everyone's standing! XD
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JBN7rEjjGrg
this is supposedly a footage from Japan...even though it's way much worse than ours but it's not really as if our population is as big as Japan's...but i wonder whether they do the same squeezing on elderly people and pregnant women too...? XD
11.13.2008
this tempts me! this is actually the proposed successor for our old time favourite- AE86! sighs. i haven't even started to learn driving.
http://sammyboy.com/showthread.php?t=9274
another interesting thread on money. but personally i feel that the issue exposes the mindset and attitude of people nowadays. especially the fact that it hints to me of the perception of having sexual intercourse as a transaction and how people perceive of money...sad.
been painting for thursday and friday. damn. in the end it's as if i have to start all over again. boring stuff...
initially planned to go out today for shopping...suddenly i lost the feeling to do so. feel like slacking the day off before i go work tomorrow...
"i shouldn't be in the scene."
11.12.2008
11.09.2008
when you feel lonely, don't ever think that you are different from the rest. you just don't understand yourself. and it's worse when there's people like me who are pure lazy to get that straight XD
still wondering what there is to buy later at orchard...a pair white jeans or pants is a must i guess...but i am worried all my 'weak points' will be exposed... XD
hm...perhaps i will update this post later at night.
广场旁边的烟囱烟雾弥漫你面容
我悄悄背颂你的温柔喝着加温后的啤酒
这样唯美的镜头是否只存在故事之中
still wondering what there is to buy later at orchard...a pair white jeans or pants is a must i guess...but i am worried all my 'weak points' will be exposed... XD
hm...perhaps i will update this post later at night.
广场旁边的烟囱烟雾弥漫你面容
我悄悄背颂你的温柔喝着加温后的啤酒
这样唯美的镜头是否只存在故事之中
11.06.2008
http://sammyboy.com/showthread.php?t=8579
basically the forum thread is talking about this chunk of comments from a china woman who is generalising asian men as if they are of the same breed. she 'briefly' describes herself as someone who is hot and smart. then she wishes to marry a rich western guy to enjoy life. then she starts talking about all only the good stuff about westerners and only the bad about the asians.
interesting article. i have also heard about asian guys complaining about the flaws of the asian ladies. but my question is: why are we complaining? does the woman think that after marrying a western guy she will stop complaining? if that's so, by all means. with this article being posted everywhere i doubt any asian guys would wanna date you too.
technically, just by reading through the thread briefly, i realised: who can prove everything she said is true? how about the photos? perhaps you sound too good to be true.
personally i can conclude: this is a typical scenario of someone imperfect asking for the perfect. i don't blame you for much because we are all greedy for the best when we don't revise on ourselves.
i am currently still in office...waiting for the damn AVG to slowly scan finish the labtop drives. was present for an informal presentation of a resource planning application, done by my another intern colleague. wah. i didn't expect that one presentation to teach me many things; as well as serving as a reminder of what i experience from microsoft's Imagine Cup. It's really hard sometimes to balance between the quality of the user interface and its functionalities for all of your superiors to be satisfied. Some are techincal some are more business-minded...oh well. perhaps i will soon face it too. quality vs. efficiency
feeling rather tired right now...i have actually been dozing off in the office lately...a sign that i am getting tired...but...so fast?! damn. i need something proper to motivate me. like...december! haha.
WAH!!! someone stop me from buying PS3!
basically the forum thread is talking about this chunk of comments from a china woman who is generalising asian men as if they are of the same breed. she 'briefly' describes herself as someone who is hot and smart. then she wishes to marry a rich western guy to enjoy life. then she starts talking about all only the good stuff about westerners and only the bad about the asians.
interesting article. i have also heard about asian guys complaining about the flaws of the asian ladies. but my question is: why are we complaining? does the woman think that after marrying a western guy she will stop complaining? if that's so, by all means. with this article being posted everywhere i doubt any asian guys would wanna date you too.
technically, just by reading through the thread briefly, i realised: who can prove everything she said is true? how about the photos? perhaps you sound too good to be true.
personally i can conclude: this is a typical scenario of someone imperfect asking for the perfect. i don't blame you for much because we are all greedy for the best when we don't revise on ourselves.
i am currently still in office...waiting for the damn AVG to slowly scan finish the labtop drives. was present for an informal presentation of a resource planning application, done by my another intern colleague. wah. i didn't expect that one presentation to teach me many things; as well as serving as a reminder of what i experience from microsoft's Imagine Cup. It's really hard sometimes to balance between the quality of the user interface and its functionalities for all of your superiors to be satisfied. Some are techincal some are more business-minded...oh well. perhaps i will soon face it too. quality vs. efficiency
feeling rather tired right now...i have actually been dozing off in the office lately...a sign that i am getting tired...but...so fast?! damn. i need something proper to motivate me. like...december! haha.
WAH!!! someone stop me from buying PS3!
11.04.2008
To Miss IThoughtItIsOnceAndForAll:
Hi.
This is how awkward the atmosphere would be if i ever i see you again. Resorting to use such an familiar greeting to someone we thought we are so familiar with...so close with.
Wonder how's life for you lately. Oh you told me it was great. And you started telling me how guilty you still are after a year etc...
Then it was you who wanted me to tell you what i wanted to say. And now you are telling me i am the reason in your guilt.
Frankly speaking. When you told me about your guilt etc...all the remnant thoughts came back just like a stagnant sponge being squeezed out of a sudden...with all the water gushing out...and it just got me even more remorseful.
Now it's not just the remnant thoughts that matter. I still habitually board the MRT at the thrid door of the first cabin. I am 'addicted' to night life. I like to see dances (hoping that i can dance myself one day).
On the other hand, you can't blame me for everything. Like what you brought with you when you lied on my shoulder at the Cathay, I have brought what i am carrying now from that fateful bus 154 trip. We are just haunting ourselves with our own past. Pardon me if it seems that i got too 'affected' from the experience i had; i have to get myself on the extreme side in order to focus on the stuff i need to do.
No doubt you have affected me in certain ways...but definitely not the fact that i hide myself even more from relationships. It's not as if i did not try to get out of the shell...the fact is that i don't have enough money(or rather too stupid and stingy) to buy you a stalk of rose or...even that feather thing phone chain at Plaza Singapura. Moreover i just don't have the mindset and confidence i am really suitable for anyone. Who wants a guy who is unromantic, can't express himself properly even to girls, who can't understand himself, who doesn't know how to take care of himself properly (not to say for his girl), who can't console people well etc...?
Stop telling all the crap that you will feel better if you were to see me with a girl on the streets...the guilt you have towards me...etc. Fact is that we are actually near mirror images. But no matter what i know i shouldn't have dragged you along onto a trip that brings you nightmares now and then. Just with that it has already hurt me all along from then. Either live with the guilt or forget me. Please.
You are really a nice girl...just that you have not realised and have not grown up at then...i am really fortunate to have met you. You taught me some...but i learnt quite an amount from the experience i had with you. Still, i say...you should have and still deserve a 200% better guy than me. I really hope somehow...in some way and some time that you will drop the burden you carry now and go to somewhere higher. My blessings in advance.
I hope you can forgive what i brought upon on you. Nevermind if you can't forgive me. Neither i can do it on myself.
Hi.
This is how awkward the atmosphere would be if i ever i see you again. Resorting to use such an familiar greeting to someone we thought we are so familiar with...so close with.
Wonder how's life for you lately. Oh you told me it was great. And you started telling me how guilty you still are after a year etc...
Then it was you who wanted me to tell you what i wanted to say. And now you are telling me i am the reason in your guilt.
Frankly speaking. When you told me about your guilt etc...all the remnant thoughts came back just like a stagnant sponge being squeezed out of a sudden...with all the water gushing out...and it just got me even more remorseful.
Now it's not just the remnant thoughts that matter. I still habitually board the MRT at the thrid door of the first cabin. I am 'addicted' to night life. I like to see dances (hoping that i can dance myself one day).
On the other hand, you can't blame me for everything. Like what you brought with you when you lied on my shoulder at the Cathay, I have brought what i am carrying now from that fateful bus 154 trip. We are just haunting ourselves with our own past. Pardon me if it seems that i got too 'affected' from the experience i had; i have to get myself on the extreme side in order to focus on the stuff i need to do.
No doubt you have affected me in certain ways...but definitely not the fact that i hide myself even more from relationships. It's not as if i did not try to get out of the shell...the fact is that i don't have enough money(or rather too stupid and stingy) to buy you a stalk of rose or...even that feather thing phone chain at Plaza Singapura. Moreover i just don't have the mindset and confidence i am really suitable for anyone. Who wants a guy who is unromantic, can't express himself properly even to girls, who can't understand himself, who doesn't know how to take care of himself properly (not to say for his girl), who can't console people well etc...?
Stop telling all the crap that you will feel better if you were to see me with a girl on the streets...the guilt you have towards me...etc. Fact is that we are actually near mirror images. But no matter what i know i shouldn't have dragged you along onto a trip that brings you nightmares now and then. Just with that it has already hurt me all along from then. Either live with the guilt or forget me. Please.
You are really a nice girl...just that you have not realised and have not grown up at then...i am really fortunate to have met you. You taught me some...but i learnt quite an amount from the experience i had with you. Still, i say...you should have and still deserve a 200% better guy than me. I really hope somehow...in some way and some time that you will drop the burden you carry now and go to somewhere higher. My blessings in advance.
I hope you can forgive what i brought upon on you. Nevermind if you can't forgive me. Neither i can do it on myself.
tonight i felt like writing two letters to two person. haha. creative idea huh?
To Mr Neutral:
It's been long since we contacted each other...i believe that both of us are on the same level of intelligence so i don't have to beat around the bush.
I was wondering whether you owe me an explanation or not. It was you who said you are the neutral line when all those crap started with Mr Childish. Maybe i might be wrong...but now to me you have chosen your side.
It was you who suggested to get together for the NS checkup...i waited till now i have heard no news from you personally.
Perhaps it's hard for people to be always neutral...perhaps when you are still an outsider you still can have that stand...but as you get further into the details...i guess your heart has already pointed to you which direction to take.
I wouldn't blame you for anything...instead i should thank you for helping us trying to solve the issue. Even though it never got better...plus as you pointed out i was at fault too...i can only say that i really hope to hear something proper from you. I rather have you saying out the reason (whatever it could be) than making yourself mute. I remembered telling you this before. Clearly.
To Mr Neutral:
It's been long since we contacted each other...i believe that both of us are on the same level of intelligence so i don't have to beat around the bush.
I was wondering whether you owe me an explanation or not. It was you who said you are the neutral line when all those crap started with Mr Childish. Maybe i might be wrong...but now to me you have chosen your side.
It was you who suggested to get together for the NS checkup...i waited till now i have heard no news from you personally.
Perhaps it's hard for people to be always neutral...perhaps when you are still an outsider you still can have that stand...but as you get further into the details...i guess your heart has already pointed to you which direction to take.
I wouldn't blame you for anything...instead i should thank you for helping us trying to solve the issue. Even though it never got better...plus as you pointed out i was at fault too...i can only say that i really hope to hear something proper from you. I rather have you saying out the reason (whatever it could be) than making yourself mute. I remembered telling you this before. Clearly.
11.02.2008
F.I.R.- 我们的爱
回忆里想起模糊的小时候云朵漂浮在蓝蓝的天空
那时候的你说
要和我手牵手
一起走到时间的尽头
从此以后我都不敢抬头看
彷佛我的天空失去了颜色
从那一天起
我忘记了呼吸
眼泪啊永远不再
不再哭泣
我们的爱
过了就不再回来
直到现在我还默默的等待
我们的爱我明白
以变成你的负担
只是永远
我都放不开
最后的温暖
你给的温暖
不要再问你是否爱我
现在我想要自由的天空
远离开这被捆绑的世界
不再寂寞
i always have the feeling that i am a bad friend. everywhere i go...just seems that i bring trouble along...i have no idea. perhaps i should just be alone sometimes. or i am at a different level from others. wierd huh? i am already sicked of working...haha.
11.01.2008
i am strange. very strange.
my heart has all the wildness while my brain is always the one restraining my heart and clearing up the mess.
sounds stupid huh? perhaps that's what people say as "Geminis have split personality".
it's only rather sad that most of us have to do what we need to do, not what we want to do. but speaking of this, if i can choose what i want to do, what would i do? most probably i will eventually waste my life off. contradictions...
oh well. my principle is simple. life is about finding your value. the value comes with a purpose for life. i will find that purpose and fulfill it. i might choose to go beyond that purpose...but of course that will be very far off from now...
main point: never believe that the stage you are standing now is the best. life's about finding a bigger stage for youself.
i guess that's the main idea that keeps me not that easily distracted from other stuff bah...ironically my mind tends to be on the extreme to keep my stand firm and correct. wierd freak.
but just somehow...all the remnant thoughts...i wouldn't say they haunt me. perhaps i just don't know how to handle it yet. i once believed that in order to get rid of the old stuff get a new one. this is never correct. at least to me. somehow we are just reminding each other of the past. childish. i know it myself. it's now a battle of whether my heart or brain will take over one fine day.
my heart has all the wildness while my brain is always the one restraining my heart and clearing up the mess.
sounds stupid huh? perhaps that's what people say as "Geminis have split personality".
it's only rather sad that most of us have to do what we need to do, not what we want to do. but speaking of this, if i can choose what i want to do, what would i do? most probably i will eventually waste my life off. contradictions...
oh well. my principle is simple. life is about finding your value. the value comes with a purpose for life. i will find that purpose and fulfill it. i might choose to go beyond that purpose...but of course that will be very far off from now...
main point: never believe that the stage you are standing now is the best. life's about finding a bigger stage for youself.
i guess that's the main idea that keeps me not that easily distracted from other stuff bah...ironically my mind tends to be on the extreme to keep my stand firm and correct. wierd freak.
but just somehow...all the remnant thoughts...i wouldn't say they haunt me. perhaps i just don't know how to handle it yet. i once believed that in order to get rid of the old stuff get a new one. this is never correct. at least to me. somehow we are just reminding each other of the past. childish. i know it myself. it's now a battle of whether my heart or brain will take over one fine day.
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